Hello friends, loved ones, well wishers, enemies:
If you are reading this, it is likely because you are my friend on facebook and have seen some of my posts about the trials and tribulations I face using online dating apps. At your urging, and my own insatiable desire to share my experiences with the world, described in a sarcastic play by play, I have created this blog.
This isn't my first blog rodeo, I grew up with livejournal and deadjournal and tumblr and other teenage angsty sites that are slipping my mind at the moment. I'm pretty experienced with angry anonymous comments and have no doubt whatsoever that I'll see my fair share here.
That being said- hello to my family members/coworkers that may be reading this- please prepare yourself. This blog will be rated pg-13. I may post some unsavory stuff sent to me by male suitors. I may curse when I'm feeling particularly expressive. And you may see some nasty things from some anonymous cranky people.
Read at your own risk.
Also please bear with me as I am NOT the most savvy with html and things like that.
ALRIGHTY So let's get to the good stuff. Some FAQ to start us off....
Q: Why are you online dating? Why can't you just go out and meet a person in real life like normal?
A: That's a great idea, and I'm kind of insulted when people ask me this because I feel like they must think I'm an idiot to not have thought of this one myself. I would LOVE to go out and meet people in real life like a normal person! However, the majority of my friends these days either a) live out of state b) are married and have no interest going to the bar with me or c) live here, are single, but still have no interest in going to the bar with me. I ain't going by myself so..if me pursuing online dating instead of actually going out seriously bothers you, then please, come to the bar with me!
Q: How long have you been doing online dating? What apps have you tried?
A: I just hit a year actually. I've tried Plenty Of Fish, OK Cupid, Bumble, Tinder, Coffee Meets Bagel, and recently Santa bought me a subscription to Match.com. I will give my personal reviews of all these apps in another post.
Q: But you're so pretty/cool/educated/fun? How are you still single?
A: This is another question I get a lot that I find to be mildly insulting even though I know it's not intended to be. I kind of feel like it insinuates that it's up to the men of the world to decide whether they want to date me or not, like I have no choice in the matter whatsoever. Really it's quite the opposite- the reason I am still single is because
I choose to be. I'm very, very picky and I absolutely refuse to settle. I would honestly rather be alone forever (and die that way surrounded by 10 dogs) than to waste time with someone I'm not 100% interested in/comfortable with.
Q: Okay but why are you so damn picky?
A: You'll better understand why I'm so picky as I post more and share some of the men that are available out there and some of the unsavory things that have been said to me. It's not like there's a billion perfect guys out there and I'm dismissing them because their eye color isn't right, or something. Furthermore, I'm a little on the unique side (aka weird) so while I get along with most people on a friendship level, for me to connect with someone on a romantic level things have to be just right. Also, my dad is amazing and my parents have a really wonderful relationship. Any of my gentleman callers have large shoes to fill.
Q: What ARE you looking for in a guy?
A: I would like to date someone who is no younger than 26, no older than 35, gainfully employed, ambitious, outgoing meaning not a couch potato because I tend to be sometimes and would like to not be, upbeat. Intelligent. Able to hold a conversation. Respectful. Thoughtful would be nice too. And I'm not going to pretend looks don't matter at all, of course they do and I do tend to go for men with dark hair, and who doesn't love Thor style muscles but I will insist forever that personality trumps looks, every single time. If you look like Chris Evans but haven't got two brain cells to rub together and you think women belong in the kitchen, then I'm sorry it's not going to work out. (A lot of Avengers references...hmm) Sense of humor is REALLY important and attractive to me. If a guy can make me laugh, really laugh, then the battle is halfway over already.
Alright I'm hungry and it's pancake time. Please feel free to comment below with more questions and....welcome. Thanks for listening.
